Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize
