ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
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