to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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