Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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