hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
