remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
