But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
