you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
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