2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
