No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
