told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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