Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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