it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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