yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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