I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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