Your tits are I can't wait for
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
