I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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