I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
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Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
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She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
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