ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Actions speak louder than pants.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Randomize
