And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize