what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
