I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
i just google imaged poop.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Randomize
