yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
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