But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
