i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
