He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I could make wine with my vomit
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
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I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
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but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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