So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Randomize
