wakey wakey hands off snakey
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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