When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
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