You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I would ride that face into the sunset
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
