he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize