im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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