these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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