Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
