Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
we're making bets on your personal life
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
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