We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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