mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize
