im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
