Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize