spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
