R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
She's the barista slut.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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