Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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