We're like a lot better than the average bears
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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