my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
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