I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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