it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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