Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
