you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
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