If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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