Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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