So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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